Midwest Mary

Question: Has a goose ever landed on your head?

I didn’t think so. I doubt that it is a common occurrence. But it recently happened to me. No joke. Go ahead and laugh. At the time, I didn’t think it was funny.

I was leaving a funeral luncheon and searching for my car, which is a common occurrence. A goose walked up to me, checked me out, and then flew so close that I ducked. (Think of the children’s game, Duck, Duck, Goose.)

But instead of flying overhead, the massive bird landed on my head. Its giant webbed feet grasped my skull like a tight-fitting hat.

The creature was bigger and heavier than I’d ever imagined. Do you know that geese can weigh as much as 20 pounds?

I screamed and shook my head until the goose flew down to the ground. I looked at it straight in its eyes and sternly said, “That wasn’t nice. Humans don’t like geese landing on their heads. Now, you stay here. I have to find my car.”

The goose didn’t respond. It stood there so innocently. I walked away while rubbing my head and checking for poop. In retrospect, I think I hurt its feelings, and that makes me sad–a little.

The first thing I did when I returned home was to shower off goose germs. Then, I Googled “goose landing on head” and got a few answers. This is what I learned.

1. The bird was defending a nearby nest or its territory. —I don’t think that was the case since we were in the middle of a parking lot and the goose didn’t own a car.
2. Any bird landing on your head is good luck. Even better if it poops on you. —Hmmmmm. I’ll take a pass on wishing for bird poop streaming down my face.
3. He wants to be with you. —-Well, normally, I would enjoy the bird’s company, just not landing on me.
4. Geese symbolize positivity because of their lasting bonds as they mate for life. They are a sign of confidence and give a sense of safety. —I didn’t feel unsafe, but I would rather not wear a goose on my head. Nor am I flattered if it wanted to partner with me.

You may remember that I wrote a poem about geese last week. I wonder if that poem foreshadowed this landing.

At any rate, please comment. I would love to hear your thoughts, especially if you had a similar experience.

*Photo by Mary K. Doyle. The photo with this post is not of THE goose. No one was available to take a photo of that one. I think if anyone saw the event, they would have said something.

**Prayer helps. Young in the Spirit, Grieving with Mary, The Rosary Prayer by Prayer, Fatima at 100. Fatima Today.